Shopping for Brats
by Useless-Italy
Summary: [oneshot] Naruto wants kids but it's impossible for two men to have a baby.  What can they do about this little problem?  Read and find out.  Little SasuNaru lemon.  This is NOT an Mpreg.  Please review!  Second chapter is an AN.
1. Chapter 1

**I know that I should finish TDF first but inspiration hit and I felt like writing this. It starts working on the plot, then a SasuNaru lemon, then I finish the story. So you guys get a little action in the middle. lol I would appreciate it if people reviewed. Thanks for even clicking on the story and maybe even reading it! XP**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. The only thing that I do own is my Ipod that I bought with my own money. piece of crap is only 1GB Grrrr… eye twitch I'm okay now. I also own my passport. I have a cool stamp of Macchu Picchu on there. That place was amazing! Okay, done now…**

**Warning: Yaoi, shonen-ai, boy x boy lemon. Whatever you want to call it but I call it hot shower smex! Also, some lame humor thrown in at random times. This is NOT an Mpreg.**

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

Naruot cuddled into his lover's muscular chest, sighing in contentment and then breathing in the welcome scent. He loved it when they would just lay together in bad at night after having sex and just bask in the comfortable silence.

He felt nimble fingers flow through his bright, blonde hair. He twitched as he felt even more fingers caress his face, tracing the whiskers that marked his angelic face.

He started to giggle when he sensed the digits that were brushing through his locks were traveling down his sides. His lover knew that he was extremely ticklish and tickled the blonde every chance he got.

The hands continued to travel lower down his lithe frame, stopping at his hips as if asking if he could continue.

Naruto shook his head into the comforting chest, answering the man with a silent plea.

He then chuckled and answered out loud, lifting his head to look into the obsidian eyes of his husband. "Sasuke, we just did it and now you want another go? I swear, I'm gonna pass out if you make me cum again."

He sighed and tightened his hold of the raven, trying to enjoy the silence again without a horny Uchiha bugging him.

He had a problem that was tugging on his conscience that he had to reveal to Sasuke. The tugging had been more persistent the last couple of days and Naruto felt like he was going to burst from the tension.

So, he lifted his head again, asking, "Ne, Sasuke-koi?"

"Hn." Came the reply from the raven, his eyes closed.

Naruto bristled and harshly said, "Look at me when I'm talking to you, teme."

Sasuke complied, opening his midnight eyes to stare into the deep pools of blue that were looking back at him.

"Okay. Now what do you want so I can go back to sleep. Unless you're willing now?" He smirked at the reaction that he got from his love.

The tanned face developed a strawberry red blush that graced his whiskered cheeks. "This is a serious question that I want to ask. Now just get that perverted idea out of your warped mind and listen to me. Please." He practically begged, putting his lips into a pout.

Sasuke rolled his eyes at his husband's antics and sighed, "Spill it."

Naruto took a deep breath before saying, "I want a baby!"

If Sasuke wasn't an Uchiha, he would've choked on his spit, but it didn't prevent a look of shock and surprise cross his face.

Naruto felt Sasuke tense up and saw the expressions of shock upon his face. "I know what you're thinking. It's physically impossible for two men to have children. I already know that. But I can't help the fact that I want a child to love and care for."

"Naruto…" Sasuke gasped as he saw tears well up in the blonde's eyes. He must of been serious about having children.

Naruto sniffled as he fought the surge of tears, urging himself to keep speaking. "I just want to feel what it's like to be a parent and I would like to see how you handle being a parent too, teme." He took a shuddering breath as he felt soft, caring fingertips wipe away the tears that fell unbidden down his scarred cheeks.

Naruto smiled as Sasuke cared for him. He melted into Sasuke's embrace, loving every second of it.

He started talking again. "I've been thinking for the past few days on how to solve this problem."

Sasuke loosened his embrace and tilted Naruto's head up to force him to look into each other's eyes. "And what did you come up with, dobe?"

"I was thinking about going to Konoha orphanage and adopting. What do you think about that, ne Sasuke?"

Sasuke answered with, "I think that it makes sense. Seeing as how you were pretty much born an orphan and I became one when I was seven. We could just add another orphan into our small, messed up family."

Naruto gave Sasuke a dazzling smile. "Thanks for agreeing with me. This means a lot to me."

Sasuke bent a little to kiss Naruto quickly. "And it means a lot to me to see you happy."

Naruto giggled. "I love this soft side to you and I'm glad that I'm the only one who gets to see it."

Sasuke smirked and dug his nose into Naruto's hair, basking in the sweet aroma. "How old do you want the kid to be?" Sasuke asked, his voice muffled.

"I don't care. I want a child that sticks out at me." He chuckled as he realized something. "I hope that they don't mind hearing noises coming out of our room at random times during the day."

Sasuke chuckled along with Naruto and said, "We can get the our room soundproofed."

Naruto laughed harder. "Yeah, and the bathroom, kitchen, living room…"

"Okay, I get it." Sasuke interrupted but Naruto kept listing various places.

"…and the porch, garden, and the attic." Naruto snorted.

"It would just be easier to lock the kid in their room and soundproof that." Sasuke suggested.

Naruto shook his head. "No. That's a part of being a parent. You have to make adjustments."

"Yeah but this is a huge adjustment!" Sasuke shouted.

"Oi, teme, I'm right here. You don't need to yell. But I guess that we could soundproof our room and the bathroom and for all of the other places, we can just wait until they go on a mission."

"What if they don't want to become a shinobi?" Sasuke murmured.

"I'm the Hokage and you're the ANBU captain. If that kid doesn't want to be a shinobi then there is something wrong with them." Naruto laughed.

"We can go tomorrow. Okay, dobe?"

Naruto nodded his affirmation. "Tomorrow it is. Let's go to sleep, Sasu-koi. I'm beat."

Sasuke grunted a reply as they both drifted off to sleep.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

The youngest Uchiha usually woke to the delicious smells coming from the kitchen courtesy of the wonderful cook that is his husband. What he didn't expect was for said cook to jump on top of him and straddle him early in the morning.

"What the hell are you doing? And where's my breakfast?" Sasuke asked, trying not to moan at the pressure Naruto was causing for sitting there.

"Why, your breakfast is right here." Naruto grinned sadistically and ground his hips into Sasuke's, earning a moan from to raven.

Naruto leaned in and whispered in Sasuke's ear, making him tremble. "I'm feeling rather dirty this morning. Why don't we take a shower?"

Sasuke flew up, almost throwing Naruto off of him and shouted, "Hell yeah!" He picked Naruto up bridal style and made a mad dash for the bathroom where the oh so sacred shower was.

"Hey teme. The shower's not going anywhere. What's the rush?" Naruto said to deaf ears. Sasuke was too turned on to listen to Naruto's troubles.

They reached the bathroom, Sasuke practically ripping the door off its hinges in his eagerness. He quickly ripped the smaller one's boxers off and tossed him into the tub.

"Itai! Maybe I shouldn't of suggested this in the first place." He rubbed his backside. "Now my ass hurts and we haven't even done anything yet." He sighed, watching Sasuke turn the water on, feeling the cold liquid pelt him as it started to warm up.

Sasuke stripped out of his boxers and hopped into the tub with Naruto. Naruto grinned as he stood up. "Is there any chance that I could be seme this time?" He asked, already knowing the answer.

The raven grunted and answered, "When hell freezes over." He then threw Naruto against the wall, knocking the air from the poor man's lungs. "I'm feeling kind of wild today." Sasuke muttered, pressing his lips against Naruto's in a searing kiss.

"Mmph…" Was all Naruto could get out as Sasuke crushed the smaller ones body between the wall and his lover.

Naruto broke the kiss in order to breath and managed to get out, "You know I like it rough, bastard."

He felt Sasuke smirk as he pulled themselves into another passionate round of kissing, turned fondling.

Naruto groaned loudly and grabbed Sasuke's midnight hair as he felt hot lips caress his neck, nipping and licking at random places. He slowly lifted his legs and wrapped them around the skinny, yet muscular body, feeling their erections against each other, moaning, "S-Sasu-koi."

He threw his head back, hitting the wall painfully, as Sasuke's talented tongue started to trace an invisible path down his neck to his chest. He didn't pay any attention to the pain as he was too preoccupied with the pleasure Sasuke was giving him.

He gasped as he felt Sasuke's nimble fingers travel down to grab his ass, thrusting hard against him.

"Sasuke, just do it teme." Naruto harshly said as Sasuke started grinding on him.

Sasuke smirked as he moved one of his hands to the entrance of the dobe's hot, tight ass. Naruto didn't need to slick his fingers or member up because of the hot water still beating down on them in the shower.

He quickly stuck two fingers in to start to stretch the moaning kitsune out. He slide another one in to start to stimulate the blonde's sweet spot, making Sasuke's cock twitch in eagerness.

He knew he found it when Naruto told him to do it again after letting out a pleasurable moan. After playing with his favorite kitsune, he placed himself in front of Naruto's entrance before roughly thrusting in, making the blonde let out a heated cry.

Sasuke held still in order for Naruto to get over the shock of the rapid intrusion.

Naruto pressed his head against the wall of the shower, exposing his delicious, tanned neck and demanded, "Move dammit."

Sasuke complied, eager to make his partner cum. He started at a slow, loving pace, listening to Naruto's quickened breathing. Sasuke moaned as he enjoyed the tight heat of his lover.

Naruto groaned, "Faster Sa-Sasu-koi."

Apparently the raven took too long to comply with his demands, so Naruto thrust Sasuke deeper inside of him, causing the avenger to grunt in surprise.

"I told you to move dammit." Naruto grunted, pulling Sasuke's lips up for a searing kiss while Sasuke obeyed the orders to move faster, deeper, harder.

Sasuke felt himself close to going over the edge and he knew that Naruto was close too judging by the intense noises bursting from his kissable lips.

Naruto dug his nails into Sasuke's back as he gave out a fiery shout of release, calling Sasuke's name and making his seed shoot onto their stomachs before it got washed away by the running water.

Sasuke bit Naruto's neck, piercing the skin, as he felt Naruto's walls become even tighter causing him to release.

Panting, both of them slid down the wall trying to regain their strength.

"Damn Sasuke, why'd you have to bite so hard?" Naruto asked, while rubbing his tortured neck and standing up.

Sasuke smirked as he stood up and licked up the small amount of blood from the wound that he inflicted onto Naruto. He chuckled. "You taste good dobe."

Naruto pouted and said, "Whatever. It still hurts though, almost as bad as my ass. Let's just take a REAL shower. I want to get to the orphanage."

Sasuke sighed. "Fine we can take a shower and then go shopping for brats."

Naruto turned around to puch him playfully. "Don't call it that. It's called adoption."

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

An hour later, without any mishaps from an overly horny Uchiha, the two men arrived at the Konoha orphanage. They entered the building and were immediately greeted by a woman in her late 40s. Her graying, auburn hair was set in a small bun, her bright green eyes twinkling, and her smile would brighten any day.

"Good morning Hokage-sama and Uchiha-sama." The woman bowed to them respectively. "My name is Aimi and I am the orphanage director." (1)

Naruto bowed his head and smiled. "I'm glad to meet you Aimi-san. We're here to see about adopting a child today, if you could help us." He turned his head. "Right Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke answered with a "Hn" and then nodded an affirmative.

Aimi grinned. "I'll be happy to help you find a child to adopt. What age group would you like the child to be in?" She asked the couple.

"Hmm… I don't want someone that's really young. What about a nine or ten year old? How does that sound to you, Sasuke?" Naruto thought and then turned back to Sasuke who shrugged his shoulders, saying, "Sure. Sounds fine with me."

Naruto smiled as Aimi turned around and led the way. "Well, the children you are in that age group are playing outside right now. I'll take you to them."

She led them outside to see several kids playing on the small playground provided for them. "You can go and talk to the children and see which one would fit into the family. I'll be in my office." She turned and walked back inside, leaving the two shinobi along with the little kids.

Naruto took Sasuke's hand, grinning. "Let's have a look around, shall we." With that being said, he pulled the silent Uchiha along to find the perfect child.

After about a minute of watching the children play, seeing if any of them caught their eye, Naruto saw a child sitting by himself with his head down as if he was ashamed of something. From what Naruto could see, he had brown hair that went halfway down his back and he was wearing worn down hand-me-downs.

He pointed the kid out to Sasuke, saying, "Let's go talk to him."

Without waiting for a reply he was on his way to the lone child.

The young boy saw a shadow cover him and gasped, shaking.

He heard an older, masculine voice say, "What's the matter kiddo? You afraid of shadows?" Then the mystery man chuckled slightly.

The boy looked up to find out who this person was and he found himself gasping as he stared into bright, shimmering eyes.

The blue eyed, blonde man laughed and said, "Cat's got your tongue? What's your name kiddo?"

The youngster gasped as he realized who was talking to him. "You're the Hokage-sama." He looked to the man that was standing beside him. "And you're the ANBU captain."

The raven remained emotionless as the blonde sniggered and stated, "Yup. I'm Uchiha Naruto and that teme is Uchiha Sasuke." He held out his hand. "What's your name?"

The boy smiled brightly, someone was actually talking to him. "I'm Toyotomi Kichirou and I want to become a shinobi so bad!" (2) He bowed his head and then shook Naruto's waiting hand. "It's nice to meet you."

Naruto smiled and asked Kichirou "Why are you here by yourself? Shouldn't you be playing with the other kids?"

Kichirou shook his head. "Nobody wants to play with me. They say that I'm weird and that my eyes freak them out. Apparently the meaning of my name isn't true seeing as I don't have very much good luck."

Naruto took the time to study the boy's eyes. They were violet with deep red around the edge of the iris. And the iris seemed to take up most of the eye. There was barely any white to see.

"Well. I think that you have very stunning eyes and if they are freaked out about yours, they should see Sasuke's sharingan. Now that is freaky."

Sasuke spoke up, his arms crossed across his chest. "What did you say dobe?"

Naruto turned to him and retorted, "I said that your eyes were strange. Are you deaf teme?"

Sasuke didn't say anything but he glared at Naruto when he turned back around.

"Well. You don't have to worry about kids being mean to you because now you can say that the Hokage-sama will personally beat the crap out of them for being rude to his Youshi." (3)

Kichirou gasped, tears coming to his eyes, he was trying not to get his hopes up. "You mean…"

Naruto grinned and said, "Yup. How would you like to be adopted, Kichirou?"

Kichirou smiled, showing how happy he was, and threw himself into Naruto's embrace, crying tears of happiness. "I would love to Youfu." (4)

Naruto chuckled and said, "You can call me Chichiue and you can call him, "He jerked his head towards Sasuke, who looked surprised at the quick selection of the child, "Tousan."

Kichirou giggled as he got out of Naruto's embrace and pointed his thumb at his chest. "And you can call me Kichirou."

Naruto smiled and ruffled his hair. "I think that I can do that." He looked at Sasuke who nodded his agreement on the blonde's decision. He spoke up. "Since you want to become a shinobi, I can help you practice if you would like."

Kichirou's unique eyes brightened at the prospect of having THE ANBU captain as his own personal trainer. "I would love to train with you Tousan!" He ran up to Sasuke and threw his arms around him.

Sasuke stiffened with the affection that only Naruto gave him relaxed into the embrace, putting his arms around the ecstatic boy.

Naruto smiled, knowing that they will be a great family together. "Come on. Let's fill out our paperwork and then we can go home."

As the trio walked back to the building, Kichirou smiled and muttered, "Home…"

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

**(1) AIMI **- **From Japanese **_**愛**__**(ai)**_** "love, affection" and **_**美**__**(mi)**_** "beautiful". I thought that it would be good to have the orphanage director that because she looks after and takes care of children who have no one else in the world so she should be very affectionate and loving.**

**(2) KICHIROU** - **From Japanese **_**吉**__**(kichi)**_** "good luck" and **_**郎**__**(rou)**_** "son". **

**(3) YOUSHI - adopted child (usu. male).**

**(4) YOUFU - adoptive father.**

**I'm surprised that I actually went online to research Japanese names. I'm so proud of myself:P**

**How was it? Was it great, okay, bad, crap, or horrible? I know the ending was kind of cut off but I didn't know what else to say. Just leave a review please! I worked my ass off on this one. I don't care if it's just to say hi but just review. It'll help my self-esteem greatly. **


	2. AN

**Okay. The sequel is posted. It is called, "Training begins" and it is rated T.**

**A reviewer asked me to post the name of the story so here it is. **

**The summary is...**

**Kichirou is 16 and his Chichiue (Naruto) asks him for a favor. What is the favor, you say? Read and find out!**

**Check out the story and be sure to review. It's a two-shot!**


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